The Magic Formula for Lasting Lifestyle Change

Embarking on a lifestyle change is no small feat. We all have compelling reasons to make these shifts, yet sticking to them long term is a mountain many of us find hard to climb. What’s the magic sauce for that those who successfully change their lifestyles? Is there a neat formula or a one-size-fits-all approach to help ensure greater success? Well, settle in friends, and let’s explore.

Lifestyle Recommendations Need to be Right-Sized

Let’s get real for a minute. As health coaches, trainers, and health care professionals, we often passionately advocate for lifestyle recommendations. You know the spiel: “150 minutes of moderate-vigorous exercise/week, eliminate soda, avoid sugar like the plague, eat 7 servings of fruits and vegetables, meditate, get 7+ hours of (high quality) sleep, drink all the water, oh, and don’t forget to nurture your social connections.” Now, as much as we love having a formula to follow, this standard set of generic recommendations may not suit everyone’s unique life situations. Everyone has their own unique set of experiences, circumstances, and motivations, and what works for one person may not be the right fit for someone (or anyone) else.

Consider Sarah: a single mother of 3, she works hard trying to make ends meet and she’s a pro at juggling life’s curveballs. But with ALL the balls in the air, she has found herself struggling with her own health and wellbeing. She’s overweight, knows she isn’t eating as healthy as she needs to, is mostly sedentary, and despite trying several times to quit, she smokes a pack a day. Recently, her blood pressure has been high, and aside from that, she has been wanting to make changes to improve her energy levels and feel better. At her last visit, her doctor told her she needs to exercise, eat healthier, and quit smoking. She nodded enthusiastically, eagerly accepting all the handouts printed for her (with all the aforementioned lifestyle recommendations), and set off to begin her health journey.

The “Maverick Myth”

Here’s where we often trip up. We cheer for the mavericks, those who have found their ways around every obstacle, hurdled each challenge laid in their path and succeeded against every odd. But what we forget is that these people are the OUTLIERS. It would be hard to know that since… we see them everywhere… Spend more than 5 minutes on TikTok, Instagram, or any other social media platform with even so much as a hint of desire for making a health change, and the algorithms will very reliably fill your feed with the courageous, inspiring stories of innumerable people finding “any way” to make it happen. They’re out there “just doing it”. If you’re not on social media, don’t worry, you’ll see the same types on reality television, or in the bookstore, smiling from the cover of their bestselling book that will tell you all the tips and tricks they used to overcome their trials and tribulations. And of course we cheer for them! It’s admirable, and inspiring, and in some ways, even temporarily motivating for many of us. After all, the underlying message (if not overt) is that “if I can do it, anyone can do it”. But that’s not exactly right.

Let’s remember Sarah for a minute, with all of her good intentions at the end of a grueling day in which she worked a double shift, and did some epic, next-level momming. Collapsing into the sofa after finally wrangling the kids to bed, she finds a sliver of solace in a can of soda and the warm embrace of her favorite TV show. You think she’s up for a late night Zumba session?

In our unwavering regard for the herculean transformation efforts of a few, we often leave the Sarahs of the world feeling inadequate, and like failures (even, and especially when we ARE the Sarah in the situation thinking we should be able to figure out a way to do those things we see all the other people doing…)

The Road to Success is Paved with Tiny Stepping Stones

People don’t “fail” at lifestyle change because they’re lazy, or unmotivated, or apathetic about their lives. We struggle with changes because our design plans for making change have missed the mark in some way. Good health and wellbeing professionals know that. We meet people exactly where they’re at. We take the time to find out where you’re coming from, and help you create a plan that’s actually manageable for you and your unique set of circumstances.

When I met with Sarah for the first time, she shared that she’s working two jobs to support her family, and doesn’t know how to grocery shop in a way that can support her family with healthy foods on her tight budget. She didn’t have experience with any tools to cope with stress that actually worked for her. Meditation? She’s lucky to have an uninterrupted shower, never mind quiet time for mindfulness. (So, good luck with tobacco cessation…) Juggling jobs, family, and financial constraints didn’t exactly leave her with leisure time for hour-long yoga sessions or gourmet healthy meal prep. But guess what? Small steps made a big difference.

But when we took the unrealistic targets off the table and made it “ok” to start small, Sarah was wildly successful! At first, she wasn’t able to quit smoking but she was able to decrease the number of cigarettes she was smoking each day. With a few tools and the right support, she found some ways to make a couple of healthy upgrades to some of the foods she and her family were eating regularly. And you know what? After a few weeks with these shifts, she started to feel a little better, and with this little boost in energy, she decided to look for opportunities in her day when she could walk -even if it was just for 1 or 2 minutes- like between her two jobs, or when she was waiting to pick up her kids from some of their activities.  Pretty soon, she was noticing more and more of those opportunities, and she was feeling better and better.

Once Choice At a Time

Adopting healthier habits doesn’t mean we need to restructure our lives overnight. In fact, an “all-or-nothing” approach can be quite counterproductive. When we put too much pressure on ourselves, we run the risk of burning out before we even start to see results.

On the other hand, embracing small, realistic changes gives us room to experiment, find what works, and most importantly, enjoy the journey. It’s all about gradually integrating healthier habits into our existing lifestyle.

Take Sarah: her biggest breakthroughs didn’t come from drastic changes, but from recognizing opportunities within her existing routines. She learned to identify moments in her day that she could use to be active, however brief. She found joy in exploring new, healthier recipes. In doing so, she not only improved her family’s diet but also transformed meal prep into a cherished part of her day. Even a little more energy and confidence was fuel for her to make lasting change, and embracing small, manageable steps that were tailor made just for her allowed her to enjoy the process.

So, what’s the secret that helped Sarah and others like her? It turns out; the magic formula is as simple as this: It’s about listening to your body and respecting your unique rhythm. And when you stumble – because everyone does – it’s about getting back up, dusting yourself off, and taking the next step.

The essence of a successful lifestyle change isn’t about monumental shifts. It’s about incremental improvements that accumulate over time.

Wherever you’re at on your own journey, just remember, it’s not a race. You have your own perfect pace and what matters is that you’re moving forward, however small the steps may seem. Your first step doesn’t have to be grand; maybe it’s just switching soda for a glass of water, or having an apple instead of a bag of chips. Success breeds success.

Ready to take the next step? Let’s take it together. In coaching, I help you find and navigate the stepping stones that make sense for the goals you’re working toward on your unique path. Let’s embrace the challenges, navigate obstacles, celebrate the victories, and journey towards a healthier, happier you. I’m here to support you every step of the way! Let’s set up some time to chat.

Also, here’s a small gift to help you get started or take the next step you on your health journey. It’s a 3 part guide to help you get your feet pointed in the direction you want to be heading. No strings attached. Just a little something from me to you. Download it here.